I have learnt that we relate on the basis of tolerance. Each one of us, whether aware of self or otherwise, pose and exhibits traits that are somewhat injurous(I swear I just made this word up, looked it up and found it actually is a real word 😊) to the people around us.
I have also learnt that, we relate based on frequency. The more frequent you relate with someone, the closer you get, the less covered up they become and ultimately the more you know about them.
Having known this, I have realized, after vividly observing human nature in terms of relation dynamics, that non of us comes choc-a-bloc dent-free. It takes the people around us to acclimatize to who we are in actual being by relating with us over time to a point of learning about our faults and deciding to tolerate us.
This has further had me woke to the reality that is very often given a myopic perspective, that, relationships are a ticking time bomb covered in a ripe avalanche, that they can collapse the day the involved party decides they do not want to tolerate the another any longer.
It is therefore of immense imperativeness to time and again assess the relatability of your environment because no one man can live and be without relating to the other. Also because people tend to take certain relations for granted and only realise its value in its dying moments, they would try to ressuccitate it but at that point is really is as good as giving CPR to a body in Rigor Mortis.
I am on record, on a myriad occassions denouncing the necessity of getting an external perspective pertaining to WHO THEY SAY THAT I AM. But then I have realized that as we live with and around people, not everyone is in agreement with our views, our opinions and ultimately who we are conflicts with what they believe. That is why it is important to time and again bend your ear to WHO THEY THINK YOU ARE, not so you can transform and be the person they expect you to be, but so you can learn to adjust in tolerance for the sake of peace and harmony each time you are around them.
